Reductio ad Absurdum

Lesson 29: Go with the system

2006-03-31T01:01:00.000+08:00

When the system sucks, use Ad Absurdum. It works sometimes.

For all the American Idol diehards, take a peek at votefortheworst.com. Quite frankly, it's brilliant. It takes a jibe not only at the fake and manipulative handling of American Idol, but also the worst singers in the show. Currently it's Kellie Pickler, and suffice to say I agree with the choice.

Lesson: Ah well, even if I do hate Pickler, she is a bit entertaining.

Reductio's Filter Killer Counter

2006-03-01T00:01:00.000+08:00

Because Sir Paolo tried to kill me with a BSOD, I (not-so-swiftly, ahehe) counter with...

Control! Alt! Delete! RESTART! Yeah, I'm alive again!

Lesson 28: Mark Twain on Religion

2006-01-31T04:14:00.000+08:00

A last potshot on religion.

I wanted to include The Screwtape Letters for some balance, but the book is not yet public domain. Too bad, because I really like the book.

Lesson: We all need something to believe in, even if it is non-belief.

Lesson 27: Discord and Cacophony

2006-01-31T03:35:00.000+08:00

How do orders about disorder manage to survive the philosophical conundrum? Try asking the Discordians, as well as the Cacophony Society.

Among friends, I have gained the moniker "Queen of Chaos". Glad to know I have company.

Lesson: Go Chaos Theory!

Lesson 26: Coincidences

2006-01-31T03:14:00.000+08:00

Is there a Patron Saint of Aburdity?

Lesson: You never know.

Lesson 25: A Techie Thang

2006-01-31T02:44:00.000+08:00

...For the benefit of any FOSS people out there (good luck), here's some Windows satire. Whee.

Lesson: We encourage diversity and competition. Sure.

Lesson 24: Yasukuni in America

2006-01-30T02:32:00.000+08:00

While surfing, i came across this. While reading the article, I forgot (for a few moments, at least) that it was a satire. Is it because of my weird antibushism? We'll see.

On the topic of strained relations between Japan, China, and Korea (an example of which is the Yasukuni Shrine issue), I wonder sometimes why only China and Korea are vocal about it. Were they the only ones affected by Japanese occupation?

Either the rest of the world has moved on and those two are whiners, or they're the only ones who care enough to speak out.

[That previous statement, by the way, is a logical fallacy.]

Lesson: Truth and history are two very different animals.

Lesson 23: Satirrhea

2006-01-30T01:58:00.000+08:00

Sure, there a dozens of satire sites out there, but for one-stop insta-gratification, I really have to recommend Satire Wire. Too bad it's no longer being updated. The Ask Jeeves Interview is funny, in a nostalgic 'hey-Ask-dot-Com-was-my-favorite-search-engine-for-a-very-short-while' way, which is why I decided to recreate the conversation with Google. I typed a query, and got the first result as Google's answer. Here's how it went:

Thanks for being withs us today, Google. How are you?
eBay US: Collector's Corner: Advertising Collectibles
What, you're advertising collectibles in eBay? How innovative!
The Archives of Advertising CD Roms
Interesting topic. Anyway, what other hobbies do you have?
Danny O'Brien's Oblomovka
...Er, I see. Obviously you have diverse interests.
Visited Countries
Can you tell us about the different places you've seen?
PuTTY Feedback and Bug Reporting
And was that as exciting as it sounds?
amkean pronunciation: it's more exciting than it sounds, this life
I'm sure it was. Ok, final question: what do you want to say to everyone?
Baghdad Burning

...Ok, that wasn't very funny. Ah well. Maybe Ask Jeeves is just a better conversationalist.

Lesson: People who hold conversations with search engines are nuts.

Lesson 22: What am I?

2006-01-27T02:02:00.000+08:00

I made a Googlism of Reductio ad Absurdum. Go try the service, it's fun. Some of my favorite lines:

reductio ad absurdum is my favorite argumentative technique so i'm going to directly quote some good bits
reductio ad absurdum is off to a splendid start
reductio ad absurdum is trivially applicable to countless circumstances
reductio ad absurdum is not available
reductio ad absurdum is intended as a self
reductio ad absurdum is not possible
reductio ad absurdum is useful and common
reductio ad absurdum is fallacious
reductio ad absurdum is playing with phonosynthesis tonight
reductio ad absurdum is but emptiness and nothingness
reductio ad absurdum is now seen as perhaps complete
reductio ad absurdum is

Lesson: We can be so many contradictory things, all at the same time.

Lesson 21: How articulate you are!

2006-01-26T05:42:00.000+08:00

So, why do black people love Sally and Johnny? Possibly because they created a site which is one of the most cutting comments on both black and white stereotypes in the US. It also illustrates the different, subtle ways one can be racist. Don't forget to read the letters page, as well. And the pictures are the bomb, yo!

Lesson: I wish there was a similar site for different races.

Lesson 20: More on myths

2006-01-26T04:14:00.000+08:00

Another tribute to the cpapability of the human mind to believe--well, practically anything. There have been a number of email urban legends already, and many people still believe these scientific myths.

Lesson: Still, chickens apparently can live with their heads cut off.

Lesson 19: And the chain remains...

2006-01-26T03:55:00.000+08:00

I read this chain letter a long time ago, but it's still hilarious. It's the type of thing I want to everyone who sends forwarded mail without thinking to read. I mean, I like spam on my plate, not my mailbox!

And you'd think people would at least edit their forwards for readability. Ah well, as said by exasperated-but-still-happy people quite often, at least we have something to laugh at.

Lesson: So, have you won a million dollars yet?

Lesson 18: More from Fr. Guido

2006-01-26T03:08:00.000+08:00

We last saw the intrepid priest from Lesson 11; now he's back! Er, not quite. This time it's Lazlo Toth, who is another alter ego of comedian Don Novello.

Over the years, Don Novello (writing as Lazlo Toth) wrote several letters to almost every important figure in America and even outside, and what was surprising was that he almost always got a reply, which makes for some hilarious correspondence. Also makes you wonder if company publicists have too much time on their hands.

The Lazlo Letters is now out on paperback, and a sample of some of those letters can be found here.

Lesson: At least 0.001% of stupid letters are fakes, at least.

Lesson 17: Come on, Kids!

2006-01-26T02:12:00.000+08:00

...This isn't exactly a letter but an article about letters, and the letters themselves aren't exactly for the site, and yes, the news is old.

Even so, comments are always fun, especially when people argue. Special attention to the astroturf letter in the comments.

Anyway, these fake letters work to serve the site's purpose through their improper implementation.

Lesson: Propaganda can backfire.

Lesson 16: The Antichrist Among Us

2006-01-26T00:03:00.000+08:00

Guess what the #1 hit on Google is when you search for 'antichrist'?

Yeah, we all know Bush is the AntiChrist (wait, wasn't it Bill Gates a few years back?). However, I like the #2 hit better -- David Hasselhoff as AntiChrist! I always thought there was something wrong with him in Baywatch.

Lesson: Someday lifeguards will rule the world.

Lesson 15: The Importance of Being Earnest...

2006-01-24T20:16:00.000+08:00

...is that it sometimes works for Reductio better than sarcasm! Especially when you're earnest about the existence of hell. Yeesh.

Lesson: "The bible is true -- in my context."

Lesson 14: Have a Break

2006-01-24T20:04:00.000+08:00

Enough is enough ... sometimes.

But where's Lesson 13, you ask?

I'm not a superstitious person; Lesson 13 does not exist not because I consider it unlucky, but because its such a cute number that I want it. All. To. Myself.

Lesson: That's something to try. For a day or two, at least.

Exam 1: Oops, late exam.

2006-01-24T14:56:00.000+08:00

Ah, well. Did you study my guide questions and your lessons? Even if you did, you still wouldn't be ready.

Take the exam now.

...What, you scored 98%? How absolutely wonderful!

Lesson 12: A Different Kind of Query

2006-01-24T04:26:00.000+08:00

The movie industry is an entire field of study in itself. A very specialized category in this field of study is being researched here, and that is the caztegory of Annoying Letters to Movie Producers. Yeah.

This could be a commentary on the stupid ideas of writers, or else on the stupid narrow-mindedness of producers; what's sure, though, is that someone is stupid. Well, we all knew that, didn't we?

Lesson: Hey, some of these aren't half-bad.

Lesson 11: How to Stop Kiddie-Porn

2006-01-24T03:59:00.000+08:00

Er, for once I'll refrain from commentary and just direct you here. Teehee.

Lesson: When in doubt about kiddie-porn, consult Father Guido Sarducci.

Lesson 10: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

2006-01-24T01:58:00.000+08:00

Double digits! Well, I have to say, I'm proud of our curriculum so far. We do have a very well-rounded offering. Reductio ad Absurdum has discussed, in order:

1. Religion
2. Showbiz
3. Politics
4. Job Resignation
5. The Evolution / ID Debate
6. Cooking, Literature, and History
7. Philosophy
8. Idiocy
9. Music

Not bad. One of my favorite topics is missing, though: Art. Well, not anymore! I have no idea who Caulder of caulder.com is, especially since it ain't exactly the most up-to-date site in the web, but it earns a place here due to its Museum. Most of the pictures are less "WOW!" and more "WTF?!", but I can't help but like his explanation for one of his museums:

This is simply a repository for cultural detritus. Perhaps the most important criteria by which the collection is selected is an item's relationship between intent, execution, and meaning. At some point, the axes where these three factors intersected was clearly defined and appropriate, at least subjectively. When observed objectively, or at least away from the original subjectivity, the artifact's true absurdity becomes the fourth, and primary, point of intersection.

Thanks for the insight Caulder, whoever you are.

Lesson: it doesn't take much for something to be called "art".

Lesson 9: Fun with Rumpusfeld

2006-01-23T23:30:00.000+08:00

As soon as songs came into existence, parody songs followed. Considered by many to be sometimes even wittier and more entertaining than the original, parody songs have blossomed and multiplied. They even have entire albums!

Classics are a good target for parodies; take If I Only Had A Brain/Heart/Nerve from "The Wizard of Oz", which was masterfully remade into "If Only I Had a Plan" by The Capitol Steps. The song lampoons the Iraq War through this "duet" by George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld. The main site has other such works by the group, of course focusing on US Politics.

One of these days I'll feature some works closer to home, but for now let's keep on laughing at those Americans.

Lesson: The original song title works for the parody version, as well. "If only he had a brain..."

Lesson 8: About Stupid Letters

2006-01-23T18:27:00.000+08:00

Balance is important in our everyday life, so at times we must balance wit with idiocy. Well, fine, we don't need that much balance, so instead of making you tear your hair out reading stupid letters (although it might be fun seeing all of you bald). here instead is The Enduring Vision's response to stupid letters.

[And for those who want to go bald, well ... there's certainly no shortage of stupid people.]

Lesson: D'oh!

Lesson 7: The Penis Be With You

2006-01-18T01:20:00.000+08:00

Because we here at Reductio ad Absurdum espouse holistic development, let us now discuss philosophy., particularly the school of thought that is called Penis Rhymes with Jesus.

Guide Questions for Tomorrow's Exam:

1. Does Penis, in fact, rhyme with Jesus?
2. Explain Comedic Logic.
3. What's with the CIA Shtick?

Hopefully we will know the right answers in time (42?).

Lesson: In the Covert Comic's Words, "because God can neither confirm nor deny."

Lesson 6: What wine goes with roasted baby?

2006-01-15T19:50:00.000+08:00

And now for a short lesson in History, Literature, and Cooking.

Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal" (thanks to Quel for pointing this out) is one of the most well-known English satires in history. It talks about cooking year-old babies in order to solve Ireland's problems of poverty, population, and underemployment, and the sincere tone of the essay sharply contrasts with its satirical content. My favorite line in the essay reads,

I grant this food will be somewhat dear, and therefore very proper for landlords, who, as they have already devoured most of the parents, seem to have the best title to the children.

It's a great read. The essay is well-crafted and makes its point in an original way.

I can imagine how someone would be tempted to implement such a policy here in the Philippines--"Let's make people who don't contribute to society lessen their genepool, please. We can even get more baby recipes at eatbabies.com!"

Scary, when you think about it too much, because in the recesses of your mind you can sometimes see the logic of it all. Heh.

Lesson: Let's eat adults too. I'm sure they'd make for good jerky.

Lesson 5: FSM and ID

2006-01-13T06:42:00.000+08:00

Funny how the letters FSM can be an acronym for so many things. Ditto fot ID. Forget acronyms though; what FSM really stands for is the Flying Spaghetti Monster, while ID stands for Intelligent Design. What do the two have to do with each other?

Well, basically, FSM tears ID to pieces. Specifically, FSM is used to counter the argument for teaching Intelligent Design in science classes. How? Like this. The site has the original letter on the front page, and further explains all aspects of FSM-ism. Fun!

It's is one of the best protest letters I've read regarding any topic. I saw this some time ago, and I really wanted to share it because the whole concept is hilarious and completely fits in with this blog's concept. All hail his noodly greatness!

A postscript for people who have no sense of humor: I have nothing against people who believe in ID; my intentions are nothing but pure. Peace out!

Lesson: Pasta beats intelligence any day.

Lesson 4: How to Leave Your Job.

2006-01-13T06:05:00.000+08:00

...Use one of the resignation letter templates available at iquit.org.

If you want to leave really quickly, use template # 7; then again, if you're angry enough to write that sort of letter to your boss, then he or she probably isn't intelligent enough to notice the sarcasm.

Incidentally, why does that site exist? I know people quit everyday, but I didn't think people would create a site for that purpose. I was expecting it to be a somewhat humorous site, especially after seeing the resignation letters that, er, were not recommended, but apparently they're serious. Sort of.

This was included solely for the sarcastic resignation letter template. Once I see a real resignation letter [one the boss actually read] that uses that format, I'll post it here immediately. No, first I'll laugh my ass off, then post it.

Huling hirit: Talong!

UPDATE: apparently there's also i-resign.com, which features even more funny resignation letters. Go figure.

Lesson: Yes, you can make money by telling people how to lose their jobs.

Lesson 3: Who is Oliver North?

2006-01-13T04:21:00.000+08:00

We've lambasted religion and celebrities; how about politics now?

A guy from Virginia wrote a couple of extremely right-wing letters to publications in the area, and some of them were published. Given that I posted these letters in this blog, you should know what the catch is.

I've always found the far right of the ideological spectrum to be funny, although I couldn't really relate to some aspects of US politics mentioned in the letters, especially since they're all rather old. Even so, I found it amazing that even if you say things you know to be absolute bull, some people will agree with you and even publish your letter.

Lesson: If you plan on becoming a newspaper editor, learn how to distinguish satire from earnest belief.

Lesson 2: Hello!

2006-01-13T02:42:00.000+08:00

Assignment: read the "Letters to People I Don't Know" by The Sarcastic Journalist.

I like her letters to celebrities because I'm an anti-idolater in possibly every sense of the word. Worship is something that doesn't come naturally to me, especially when the supposed object of worship is some talentless hack who can't sing to save her life.

I'm too cynical sometimes, I know. But admit it: the screaming women watching Oprah are a bit grating.

Lesson: If you're gonna scream your head off for someone, at least make sure that you bag some freebies.

Lesson 1: At least you can own a Mexican.

2006-01-10T16:27:00.000+08:00

This is the reason why I got the idea for this blog. It's an open letter to Dr. Laura Schlessinger, and now it's known as the "Why Can't I Own A Canadian?" letter. I orignally read it here, while surfing.

It's a rather old letter, and it's been spread all over the net, but it's still pretty funny. Sometimes the most exasperating people are those who "agree" with you much too much.

There are several versions of the original (which was the result of the online equivalent of gossip ... I wonder how you'd play pass the message on the Internet?). There's one variant of the letter whose content is pretty much the same, but addresed to George Bush. I think he deserves to receive it.

Lesson: Be careful what you teach, because some smartass is going to be a hell of a quick learner. Peace out!

Absurdity, or something like that

2006-01-10T08:26:00.000+08:00

I first encountered the term Reductio ad Absurdum in high school, when it was used as a proof that the square root of two was an irrational number. Literally it means "reduction to the absurd", and is a method of proving a claim untrue by assuming that it is true and then showing how utterly absurd everything would be if it were actually true, thus proving it false. A good example of the method in logical debate is shown in Wikipedia.

So, what am I doing naming a blog for my CW 198 class after a method of proof? Elementary, dear bloggers. Sarcasm in itself is a great application of reductio ad absurdum, and letter writers have been making good use of their tools. Sarcastic letters may be childish and sometimes conceited, but oftentimes they make a great point while remaining hella funny. You'll get what I mean after you read the next post, which will be Lesson 1.

I'm not limiting myself to letters, though---who know's what sorts of clever reductions to absurdities we'll find? In the meantime, all hail the silly and absurd!

[After all, without you, we wouldn't have anything to laugh at.]

Site Notes

2006-01-10T08:05:00.000+08:00

Yes, and after weeks of procrastinating, I finally chose a topic and put up a blog. Hurrah.

Some site-related ramblings to start off, then:

The header was made using three paintings by Edvard Munch: The Scream (or The Cry, according to this site ... it's a translation thing), Ashes, and The Dead Mother. Yeah, I know, all the paintings are bleak and feature a person holding his or her head in apparent anguish, but I don't care. I like them. And in the context of is blog, they look comical anyway, so that's all right.

Speaking of the header, no, the fact that it's kind of huge has not escaped my notice. To rephrase the previous paragraph's statement: I don't care, I like it that way. ^_^

This site was tested in Internet Explorer 6 and Mozilla Firefox 1.5, on a monitor with a resolution of 1024x768. It looks as it should in all those configurations (although I had to use an IE hack in the CSS ... ah well. When will Microsoft release a standards-compliant browser, anyway?).

Ergh. Rambling too much is bad for coherency. I'm out.